Monday 13 July 2009

How to wrestle free from an alligator

I'm on my way to New Orleans for the Microsoft WPC. Microsoft always puts on a great show and I'm looking forward to this year's event. That said, this will be my first time in New Orleans (and in Louisiana in general) so I thought it prudent to do some preliminary research prior to my arrival. The following excerpt is taken from Piven & Borgenicht's Complete Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook (only $20 CAD):

How to wrestle free from an alligator

  1. If you are on land, try to get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down.

  2. Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate.

  3. If you are attacked, go for the eyes and the nose. Use any weapon you have or your fists.

  4. If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (for example, a limb), tap it or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouths when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of, and back off.

  5. If the alligator gets you in the jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or rolling over - these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking.

  6. Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths.

And now I'm all prepared for my trip to New Orleans. Come and get me, alligators!

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